At My Best

Life is filled with ups and downs. There will be days when I felt like I hit rock bottom. I have reflected on the worst days many times, but the one time when I felt the best, I’ve never really talked much about it.

I had always been that kid who was always shy. Hiding from facing an audience, more like I mess up once and didn’t want to mess up again.

In fourth grade, we performed a play, Hansel and Gretel. Did I act? No. In actuality, I was the narrator. The play was a success. Teachers liked my English back then. Well, soon 4 years later. I was asked to be the host with a classmate. She and I were ready for it. We even planned and drafted a script in English.

Guess what happened next? We were given a pre-written script in Hindi. Sure, no problem with that, but it was the content of the script that. Hit me, it was cringing. Mostly it was filled with a few flirting dialogues. I wasn’t okay with it. I messed up all of it. She made up for both of our lines. I constantly shuddered. Each line felt more humiliating than ever before.

 

Fast forward a few months, and I got another opportunity to speak. This time, no one changed the script. I had a shaky voice, missed a few words, and even connected the dots. At that moment, on stage addressing what I felt and what I had in mind to a diverse audience, I took control. The words were mine, a reflection of who I was.

A few days later, my name was on the TOI (Underprivileged kids learn ‘no means no’), that moment is simply beyond my words. My parents were proud just to see my name printed on a piece of paper. I felt like it was all worth it. I was more excited to show it to my friends. That same day I took the Cutout to my friends and tutors, I could see the admiration they had in their eyes. I felt like I was on top of the world.

I realized I wasn’t a terrible speaker because I was nervous. I was never bad at it. In actuality, it was only a matter of taking back control.